Monday, June 17, 2013

Oxygen

I feel as tho I start every morning with my fingers crossed. I am afraid to hope but this week has been wonderful.
I canceled our visit with Seth's case manager last week because our previous visit seemed to upset him. I did not want to risk ruining a perfectly good day. I worry that any good day can be jinxed by a misspoken word or a promise not kept.
But yesterday I had to risk breaking the fragile ice we walk on and invite her in. I reminded Seth that the program was voluntary and I thought he would opt out. But instead, he talked about college and his future with excitement. He sounded hopeful- like any other teenager about to enter adulthood. He saw possibility and promise in his future. I wanted to cry with joy but played it cool, as if it was not the best day of the entire year. I wanted to kill the fattened calf and break out the vintage wine. Send shouts of thanksgiving to the heavens.
I have hope. I am not living each day in fear.
Not this week.
Not today.
And today is what matters.

1 comment:

  1. HI! I have a question about your blog could you email me please? Thanks, Heather
    Lifesabanquet1 (at) gmail.com

    ReplyDelete